You'll be Proud to Say
"I Got Mayan!"

As you can see, the cloaks come in all colors imaginable, from Apple Red, Bubblegum Pink, Greenbay Packer Green,"Campbells of Argyle" Plaid, Zebra Stripe and everything in between. Just write in your favorite color and hit the Buy Now Button, be assured that all cloaks are One-Size-Fits-All and tag-free for your comfort.

$49.95 is a small price to pay for your Apocalyptic Survival.


"The cloak has changed my life...women can't resist me now, and small animals often follow me home."
~Shakti Jones
Yoga Instructor

"It's incredible, since wearing the cloak, my tips and income has tripled, and my love life has just skyrocketed!"
~Leslie Goodlight

"I have a new-found inner peace, I feel at one with the world, my blood-pressure is stable and I finally realized my dream of opening a shelter for homeless cats."
~Antoine Abramowitz
Former DJ, owner of Antoine's Cat House


"I have reverse engineered the cloak and now have a Pakistan factory working three shifts a day on knockoffs. You will soon not be seeing them everywhere for $9.95!"
-an evil entreprenuer
Kerrville, TX

"It's comfy! And warmer than it looks."

"Order now, so everybody can clearly see your nuts!"

"Oh yay! This is my truly lucky day! Can't WAIT for the apocalypse now!"

"Notice how slender it makes you look, I'll take two!

"I'm goin to bedazzle mine and glue some fairy dust on it for added bling! Whoo hoo!"

"I already have mine in Galaxy Black!"


"I love how it matches the vacant expression of my eyes!"


"I LOVE IT! I've just ordered one each for my entire family! And the apartment complex across the road, too."


* No written or expressed guarantees are made about the use of alternative, metaphysical or spiritual tools, services and supplies. This site is for entertainment purposes only and is done in parody... "It's a joke son..." ~Foghorn Leghorn

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